I don't even know.

I had no idea that when I started trying to get pregnant everything would suddenly have the potential to make me cry.  Simple things like:

Seeing a dad take a car seat out of a minivan in the Steak N Shake parking lot.
Talking to an asshat of a parent for one of my students.
Someone asking me how my kid is doing (No idea about that one.)
Planning a vacation for later this year
Periods, cramps and anything sort of unusual with my body

Honestly, all of those things involve me- my worries and my situation and my future.

But tonight I cried, I mean really cried, about a few situations that don't involve me. The TTC/infertility blogosphere has some tough TOUGH women.  Women who have been battling for years.  Women who have, as one of them I've read has written, "earned their stripes".  As I was catching up on reading some posts tonight my heart just hurt so much.  From infertility struggles to the challenges of IVF to the realization that the ability to carry their own child will never happen, these women just laid it all out there.  And it's so raw.  It's so incredibly raw.  Just thinking about it right now brings tears to my eyes.

How many women are going through this RIGHT now? How many husbands?  I just had no idea.  It took TTC for me to open my eyes to some of the pain that's been around me all along.

This just breaks me.  I want to do something to help.  I don't know what I need to do yet, but I need to do something. Even if it just helps one person, I want to help.